“Don’t give up.”
“The storm will pass.”
“Stick with it.”
How are we resilient when life seems to give us a swift kick? How do we just shrug off difficulty when our hearts are hurting? How do we hold on, so we don’t get lost when we are facing adversity?
Whether it’s living beyond the divorce, walking through infertility, enduring ANOTHER deployment, recent illness, or any other personal challenge, how we respond to these hard seasons expose the condition of our hearts.
Cultivating resilience when we are facing adversity can help us move forward in healthy ways. So let’s talk about what that looks like in our everyday lives.
Cultivate healthy, supportive friendships
Do you have a circle?
You know, those women who will fight for you, pray for you, meet you at the altar, cry with you, bring you cookies and watch tv in their PJs with you women. The kind of women who will cheer you on when you are blessed and believe God’s best for you when you walk through the winter seasons of life. The kind of women who will step into your darkness, hold your hand, and are not scared of the messy places of life.
These women—they matter.
Cultivating healthy, supportive friendships provide support, encouragement, love, and hope when you want to walk away from what God has called you to do. These friendships remind you of God’s promises and hold you accountable for walking boldly in Christ. Together we are stronger. Together we are braver. We are better together.
So let those women in your life. Let them in your mess. Pain has a way of wanting to isolate you, keep you in your pain, and feed you lies no one understands. But love draws you in. Use your voice and let others know how to help you, love you and be there for you. Healthy supportive friendships will help you when you are facing adversity.
Cultivate an attitude of gratitude
Too often in hard seasons, we can spend too much time, and effort focused on the bad. We speak more about the illness than how we are living our lives. We talk more about what our husbands are not doing. We complain about how the kids don’t listen. Venomous words spew out of our mouths seeking to poison anyone who will listen. This negative talk will not sustain you in the difficult moments. Quite the opposite. All those complaints will drain you of your energy, steal your joy and rob you of your peace.
Tell that negative committee hosting tea inside your head the meeting is adjourned. Your current situation will no longer sway your thoughts. Those negative thoughts about the challenges in your marriage, with your kids or on your job are going to be replaced with words of praise to God. His word is your truth.
Choose today to praise Him. While you are in this hard season, keep a gratitude log. Every day remind yourself of the promises and blessings of God. Only His word and His truth will help strengthen you to build the resiliency you will need to walk through this hard season.
How you cultivate resilience in the hard season has a lot to do with how you take care of YOU! So guess what? Your body needs proper sleep and exercise. Put that phone down. Stop scrolling late at night. If you are going to be up, get in your Bible and do something productive.
During this time, pay attention to your own needs and feelings being aware of when you need additional care. One of the worst steps women make during hard seasons is to stop taking care of their bodies. We stop exercising and indulge in food for comfort.
Self-care is about more than bubble baths and pleasant walks. Self-care is doing the hard thing for yourself when it is not convenient. Do the meal prep. Go for a walk. The increased stress which usually accompanies challenging seasons can be prevented by deliberate decisions to take care of you. Engage in activities you enjoy, and you find relaxing. Put it on your calendar and protect that time. You matter!
When we are facing adversity, choosing to cultivate resilience requires us to be intentional. Choosing supportive friendships, having an attitude of gratitude and creating a self-care routine can help us build resilience. We don’t have to endure hard seasons alone.
I love “attitude of gratitude.” Thank you for this uplifting post. It is such a great reminder. This too shall pass.
Mamie L. PackLanaPummill
Such a great attitude to have, right?
LanaPummillMamie L. Pack
Love your gratitude prompt log! will have to incorporate those into my nightly writing!
Mamie L. Packraisingamzylee
Yay! Glad to hear it. Do you use anything in particular for your nightly writing?
Melisa from Crushing Motherhood
This is a great post, especially the gratitude log. I’ve saved that image to my phone. Thanks!
Mamie L. PackMelisa from Crushing Motherhood
Yay!!!! Let me know if you add anything to it.
We have had a tough two years after my husband lost his job so we have had to dig deep! All of the are such valid points!
Mamie L. PackHarassedmom (@laurakim123)
Thanks for sharing! In the hard seasons digging deep can be an understatement, but good for you that you are!
Samantha | The Vegas Mommy
I definitely agree with these! It’s so important to talk to your trusted friends, but to make sure you’re talking about all the positives in life most of the time. Self care is definitely so hard during the worst time, but it definitely needs to be done. I feel like when I neglect myself during bad times, it’s actually harder to pick myself back up because I’m feeling bad about myself from neglecting myself
Mamie L. PackSamantha | The Vegas Mommy
Yes! Sometimes we ignore self
Care in the bad as if it is punishment for not being able to do it all. Doing small things like reading, resting, meditating all help.
The Washington Pineapple (@wa_pineapple)
Love this. Very uplifting..
Mamie L. PackThe Washington Pineapple (@wa_pineapple)
Shelby @ Blooming Beckers'
Cultivating those friendships are so important! We moved 2 states away last year and rebuilding a new community has been difficult but so important for me.
Mamie L. PackShelby @ Blooming Beckers’
We are a military family, so moving is all too familiar. It takes time and intentionality to build community. Good for you for stepping out!
Well put! I remember first learning about an “attitude of gratitude” during one of the most difficult, stressful spells in my life, and it truly HAS made a difference! 🙂
Mamie L. PackFlossie
Yes it does Flossie! That attitude of gratitude changes our entire posture toward our life situations.
A reminder to look for the blessing and be thankful is a reminder we always need even more so in the hard days.
Mamie L. PackCrystal
Absolutely Crystal! There is some good even on the hardest days.
I so agree with culitvating health friendships. It’s so vital to surviving seasons of suffering.
Mamie L. Packthehabibihouse
Oh, yes. Life is sweeter
Mamie L. Packthehabibihouse
Oh, yes. It is so important.
These are great suggestions! I need to be more grateful in my life. When I say that, it is not that I am not grateful on the daily, but writing it down can be a life changer! 🚢👓🍕
Mamie L. PackCeci Rey
There is definitely something powerful about writing it down or saying it out loud that helps our brain.
Lindsey | GreenMamaLife
I love this! It’s always great to work on self growth when times are easier so the hard times aren’t so hard. Practicing gratitude is Definitely an amazing way to always make sure things never feel too hard.
Thanks for sharing!
Oh my goodness I read the title wrong and thought it said how to build resilience with hard “sea sons” I thought at first glimpse oh that is an interesting way to describe a difficult son lol! Seriously though these are all great ways to get through the tough seasons of life. Finding gratitude in this season with Coronavirus is my way right now. Love your journal prompts.
Love this! Great post!
Mamie L. PackKristine
Thanks so much for stopping by.
Every night I think of three things I’m grateful for that day! Really can change your mindset.
I’m doing my best, but at times it is hard to find that “attitude of gratitude”. Thanks for these reminders 🙂
This is so needed in the world right now. We’ll written! Xx