Well, here we are.
The last day of 2017.
It wasn’t that long ago that I was sitting here, looking at my word for the year-BUILD.
At first, building sounded so exciting, but that was until I read the definition.
BUILD: to form by ordering and uniting materials through a definite process to create a whole
I don’t know about you, but three words stuck out to me from this definition—order, unite, and process.
The first step this year was order. God first. Nothing added. Just that one simple concept.
Ummm, I already loved God. I had accepted Him as my Lord and Savior many years ago. I had an active relationship with Him. So, what was this order thing that He put in front of me?
More and more, the Holy Spirit revealed areas where I was my own hero and God my awkward side-kick. Areas that I thought I could handle on my own. Areas that I thought were too trivial to my big God. Areas that I marked off limit because to let God in meant feeling pain where indifference had become familia. That is when I realized to build, it all had to be His. My fears. My pain. My anger. My rejection. My pride. He wants it all!
Building required constantly checking in with the God-the master architect. Where did the doors need to go? Where did I need creative outlets? What needed to stay on the first floor? But to build, I had to be willing to surrender my ideas for His master plan.
Our local church would have a tremendous role in how I would build this year. Little did I realize how saying yes to uniting with other women in Sisterhood would positively impact my life and the lives of my family. For the first time in a while, I was no longer hiding in the background hoping that I would not be seen. I allowed myself to be engaged in building new friendships and continuing to cultivate the ones already a part of my life. Throughout the year, I would make the decisions to show up instead of pull away.
Building became a continual process of discerning between good opportunities from God opportunities. Sometimes it meant saying no to things and activities I really, really wanted. Sometimes it meant feeling like I was missing out only to realize God was inviting me into something more meaningful. A process that involved stretching in all sorts of uncomfortable ways in inconvenient times. Without the process His way, whatever I built would have no lasting impact.
As I sit here to say so long to this year of building, I am thankful I was able to
Build the kingdom of God
Never could I have imagined the growth and stretching that God had in store for the year.
2018, I’m coming for you!