Refresh & Renew: 3 everyday habits to stop so you can enjoy your day
We all have some bad habits. We just don’t think about how they get in the way of living he life we want.
If you don’t take notice, these bad habits interrupt your day, preventing you from being present in your relationships and accomplishing your goals. You end up paying the price both physically and mentally.
By the end of the day, you go to bed drained, discouraged, and feeling disconnected.
Even when we make up our minds to enjoy our day, our bad habits find a way to mess it up.
Now, I don’t have all the answers to changing bad habits. But I do know three habits that we can all stop and what you can do about them, so tomorrow is a better day.
Are you the type of person who is always “in your head”? You know. The type of person who lays in bed at night replaying conversations about things you should have said, opportunities you missed and analyzing if you did everything “right.” Although there are several benefits to reflecting on our day so that we can grow, improve and learn, reflection is not the same as overthinking. Overthinkers can spend hours stressing over large decisions or minute detail. Unfortunately, overthinkers don’t tend to focus on all those warm and fuzzy thoughts. Nope! Instead, all of those thoughts are permeate in negative self-talk leading to a feeling of being overwhelmed and discouraged.
Sadly, too many of us get stuck in our heads. We lose rest. We waste time. We feel stressed. Overthinking takes away from enjoying our day.
- Set time limits to reflect: Just because I say stop overthinking doesn’t mean it is just going to end. So, if you are going to overthink, give yourself a certain amount of time to get it all. What are you thinking? Why are you feeling it? What has you worried? At the end of your timeframe, get up and do something productive. Just don’t sit there spending more time thinking about what you were thinking.
- Set the next step: Overthinkers often get stuck in their heads because they see all the “what ifs” and stressed by all the options. Excitement quickly leads to overthinkers becoming overwhelmed. To combat this behavior, identify just the next step. Don’t focus on the big picture. What’s your next step? Do it.
“They never do anything right.” “I always have to do this myself.” “How hard is it to help out around here?” “They never listen to anything I say.”
Has this ever been you? I know it has been me when I have seen one too many messy bedrooms, dirty clothes on the floor, or have been overlooked for a position at work. Complaining happens without even thinking about it. Whether you feel comfortable calling it venting or fussing, it’s still complaining. And you know what? Nothing is ever solved. We end up upset, irritated, and probably nagging the people around us.
What do you do when you find yourself always complaining? Simple. Turn your complaining to gratitude.
Every time you start to complain about what your spouse did or did not do, choose to speak words expressing your thankfulness for what he does do for you and your family. Before you start complaining because the kids are on your last nerve and you can’t ever seem to have anything nice, choose to express your gratitude for being a mother and the opportunity to raise your children. There will always be moments that push us to our limit, but even then we can decide to use our words to express our gratitude. It’s our choice.
Learning how to identify the best yes is often a challenge when you get invited to do things you want to do. Yes, you want to get coffee. Yes, you want your kids to be on the soccer team. Yes, you want to do a couple’s night out. Yes, yes, yes. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should. Nothing makes a mom turn into a walking nagamomster (A nagging mom monster! Yep, I made that up. You’re welcome!) than when you are rushing the kids out the door because you scheduled too much for your day. You fuss. You yell. You just are not nice to be around. Then we have the nerve to say it the kids fault for making it hard to do things. It wasn’t your children. It’s not school. It is about how you manage your time.
Overcommitment impacts those we love the most because we are not present enough to enjoy the moment. Our eyes are regularly checking the clock or for phone alerts. Our bodies are too tired to enjoy being intimate with our spouses. Our attitudes and patience are short.
You can turn this around with a simple NO. Embrace white space on your calendar. This white space will allow you the time to do the things that you want to do with the people who matter most. When you say yes, ask yourself:
- Do I have time to say yes and enjoy this?
- Am I saying yes out of obligation?
- Does this even matter to me?
- If I say yes, where will I say no?
Great ideas to stop being nagomomster! Wow, were you at my house? Be grateful for what I have, what I get to do!
Mamie L. Packfladson2
Gratitude can definitely change our bad attitudes!
I LOVE this! And I definitely need to work on all 3. I love how they are so practical! Thanks for sharing!!
Mamie L. PackNicole Kauffman
I am glad you found this helpful!
Oh, yes! I learned the hard hard way that just because I can doesn’t mean I should. Love this. Especially since I am naturally an overthinker. Time limits … I’ll use that tip.
Mamie L. PackSheri Traxler
Creating healthy boundaries is important to put in place even for ourselves.
I love this. You gave 3 simple but huge bad habits, and I must say they were perfect. Each one applies to me. 😐 Thanks for the great action points for each too! God bless.
Mamie L. PackHISsparrowBlog
It is amazing how these daily habits take away from enjoying life. Any one in particular you plan to tackle?
HISsparrowBlogMamie L. Pack
All 3, but especially the complaining. 😕
I LOVE THIS POST. I am such an over-committer, and have seen the other two habits in my life as well. Your advice rings so simple and true. Thanks for this encouragement!
I tend to be an over-thinker (well all three really) but one way I have worked on the over-thinking has been to write down my thoughts. It’s amazing how much more you can identify your thoughts as irrational and emotional when they are down on paper as opposed to rattling around in your head! Getting it out on paper also helps your mind to stop replaying it.
Mamie L. PackMelissa
That is a great strategy. I do brain dumps on a regular basis to help. Do you use that strategy too?
This was definitely a post I needed to read on this exact day. Just last night I was overthinking and my excitement for starting something new led to overwhelm within a matter of hours. Thank you for speaking truth to my heart, soul AND mind!
Mamie L. PackJenny
Jenny I have been there toooo many times. That is one of the reasons I love post it notes. I can put reminders to myself everywhere that God’s got this! I just need to trust.
GREAT post!! I am both an over-thinker and over-committer! Really have to work on this. Thank you so much for sharing those tips!
Mamie L. PackAdaras
Me too!!! Gotta take it one day at a time.
I really needed this today! Thank you so much for sharing.
Mamie L. PackMichelle Morgado
I am so glad you found this helpful. Thanks for stopping by.
Yes Mamie, paying gratitude is the best habit and change you for better. Thanks for sharing. I myself is a great believer of replacing bad habits with good ones.
Mamie L. PackGursimrat
Focusing on what we are thankful for definitely helps shift out perspective for the better.
I am an over thinker AND an over committer. I’m working hard to change both of those.
Mamie L. Packtramayne
Oh, I can relate. What step will you to to move past overthinking?
great tips and I love how they are all based in a verse.
Mamie L. PackCrystal Russell
Thank you Crystal!
I’m the over thinker but I’m learning to get better at this.
Mamie L. PackNatalie
Cheering you on!
Nagamomster, hehe, I love that! I definitely go into the overcommitment category. I think I need to learn how to prioritize the really important things and not try to them all. Thank you for this post.
Mamie L. PackCristina
Thanks for stopping by!
Giselle Y Mama
OMG! I am completely guilty of all three! However I am aware of them and feel that I have come a long way. Such a good read!
Mamie L. PackGiselle Y Mama
What can you start doing to make a change?
I just watched a video today on the complaining society we have all created and that we are the keepers of our own mind. We are in charge of how we think. And if you want to find something to complain about, you will. If you want to find something to be appreciate for, you will. Great post.
Mamie L. PackLenee’
What we feed is up to us. We can feed faith or fear, hope or anger, gratitudes or complaints.
I really need this motivation and positivity. Thanks for this post
Mamie L. Packmylittleduniya
Awesome! Glad you were encouraged today.
Hoang Vi Fessenden
I really love the part about complaining!!
Mamie L. PackHoang Vi Fessenden
When we focus on our gratitude, complaining goes out the window.
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Complaining!!! Yes!! I have been working so hard to shift what I say about people, situations, etc. It’s made such a difference. Instead of gossiping about others, I’ve tried to simply pray for them. Instead of focusing on the one bad thing that went wrong that day, I try to point out the things that are going well and that we still have to look forward too. It’s amazing how changing your mindset really changes your life!
Mamie L. PackMorgan
Changing our mindsets is important. We stop seeing the lack and see all the possibilities.
These are three great things to remember everyday. I’m going to be mindful of them and hope for more positive days ahead! Thank you for sharing!
Mamie L. PackRaisa Mia
Oh, yes! Our habits become our lives. It’s important we are building good ones.
I’m currently sitting at this table. So much going on around me at the moment and my brain is just speeding down the overthinking and complaining fast lane. I think I just have to pulse and take a break. Thank you for sharing, very timely blog post.
Mamie L. PackGrace
Grace, I totally understand. Pausing is a great habit to build.